Protector of the King's Jewels

What do you all think of the newest addition to the Golden Gate?

As BE4MJ so astutely pointed out after hours of careful inspection at 500% zoom, the codpiece appears to be smudged with numerous fingerprints.  Since Michael is wearing gloves, his raises several questions:

1.  Whose fingerprints are they?
2.  Are there more than one set?
3.  How would one go about obtaining a job as the dresser of the royal prick?  (I know, I know:  language)
4.  Why wasn't the codpiece polished?  If it was at some point, does this mean there was a fair amount of "handling" after it was fastened on?
5.  Who was the lucky wench who got to remove it as the concert progressed?  Could it have been that Yana girl who practically sucked his zipper open in that one clip?

Additional questions raised by this picture:

1.  What on Earth is the purpose of that hole in the swell of the codpiece?
2.  Why is it off center?
3.  Isn't that thing incredibly uncomfortable given the massive carat weight of the jewels it encased?

So many questions, so little answers.  I guess this warrants further inspection.  (Does my computer go up to 1000% zoom?)

I'm guessing the prints belong to the dude with the ponytail... Or Michael, before he put on his gloves... Surely, they did NOT belong to some hoe!

^^^I have seen the whole uncropped photo.  I could have sworn those were his wife's hands.  I'll leave it up to you to decide which wife.

(That was mean and uncalled for and I didn't really mean it.  )

Well, I just asked one similar question- but I should have known there was a whole thread about the roal codpiece!

I was just going to say, since the hands are hairy, I know which wife, but that also would be unkind and uncalled for....

I am thinking the hole was a steam valve.  Apparently Mike Jr. (aka Jo-Jo) produced a lot of heat.   We wouldn't want him to just blow, now would we????

Maybe it was a finger hole so he could check to reassure himself.

or maybe mike was trying to get a little jerk before work . lol

There is no way Jo-Jo would have fit through that hole under any circumstances.  They would have needed a surgeon to get him out of that codpiece!

Is this a magic trick?  Nothing gets in or out?  Nothing up his pants legs?  Should we consult Criss Angel?  Or is it like a Chinese box? Or maybe the nozzle is a latch.   I am perfectly willing to go through layers to find the prize inside.

I'm LOL@Chinese Box!  Welcome back angel-watcher!

I want that prize in that box!  Michael, are you the prize in my Cracker Jacks?

No dear. He's the POWERBALL jackpot.

I've decided Michael must have let fans come up and rub and kiss the codpiece for good luck  like the Blarney Stone.  That's where all the fingerprints came from!

NO it's not PJ!!! It's not, it's not, it's not, it's not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not!!! It's the wardrobe guy. The nasty longhaired wardrobe guy. No women were EVER near that codpiece! That's my story and I'm sticking to it!

I'm afraid so, Tholstrup.  How do you think they tested it to make sure he wouldn't injure himself when he began to "really enjoy" his performances?  Tumescence testing!  It's okay.  He did it out of duty to his fans.  It wasn't for his own gratification, I'm certain of it!

I guess we know who the fingerprintes belong to now, huh? Sorry, couldn't resist

Whom, indeed!